A. You seem to be distracted by illusions; thoughts of the past and the future. Then, you cannot be concentrated on your meditation as you spend time struggling to fight off your illusions during your practice. This causes you to feel more exhausted than refreshed after meditation. This happens because you don’t practise in the right way.
Try to focus all your attention to your koan, Zen question. If you find it difficult to do so because of worldly thoughts, illusions, don’t try in vain to fight them off. As mentioned previously repeatedly, there is nothing that is not the true-Self. Not only the worldly thoughts but also your anger is also part of the true-Self. That is, you are mistaking the true-Self for anger, or worldly thoughts. They are no other than the true-Self you are looking for. I’d like to advise you to trace your anger, or illusions back to their root instead of fighting against them. They, well used, can be a nice way to enlightenment.
All writing ©Boo Ahm. All images ©Simon Hathaway
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